Infy Vs TCS Vs Wipro! ! !

Toooooo goooood -



Who is the BEST - Infosys, Wipro or TCS?




One day, three consultants, one from Wipro, one from Infosys and one from TCS, went out for a walk.



"Why don't we prove who is the best among ourselves?"



Why not, said the other two.



The Infosian said "Let's have a test. Whoever makes this monkey laugh, works for the best firm".



Being a pure logical strategist, the person from TCS tried to make the monkey Laugh by telling jokes. The monkey stayed still.



As a more practical consultant, the Wipro guy tried to make funny gestures... No good, the monkey stayed put...



Now, comes the Infosian. Being the practical guy he was always trained to be, he whispered something into the monkey's ear, and it burst out laughing at him..







The other two were astonished. So the Wipro guy said "OK, let's take another test. Let's make this monkey cry!!"



So there they went again, applying the same methods as before. The TCS guy narrated sad stories, the Wipro guy made sad gestures, and they failed again...



Then, the Infosian again whispered something into the monkey's ear and oh! It started crying, patting the Infosian's shoulder!







The other two just could not believe their eyes! So the tcs guy said "OK, you've won twice. If you can win just this one, we will bow to you. Let's make this monkey run".



And he barked at the monkey and ordered him to run. Of course, it stayed where it was.. The Wipro guy, true to his type, pushed and prodded the monkey- still No go.



So...here comes Infosian, again, and whispers into the monkey's ear. The Monkey just takes off! It runs and runs as fast as it can, as if it was scared to death!



The other two surrendered.



They said: "OK, we give up.



You're the best among us, and you work for the Best firm of the three. But please, please tell us your secret," they begged him.







"Well", said the Infosian, "The first time I made it laugh, I told I work for Infosys. The next time, I told the monkey how much I get paid ...so it started crying.



And then I told that I was here for recruitment!!!

Automatically number rows in Excel

Fill a column with a series of numbers

Note: These numbers are not automatically updated when you add, move, or remove rows. You can manually update the sequential numbering by selecting two numbers that are in the right sequence, and then dragging the fill handle to the end of the numbered range.

1. Select the first cell in the range that you want to fill.
2. Type the starting value for the series.
3. Type a value in the next cell to establish a pattern. For example, if you want the series 1, 2, 3, 4, 5..., type 1 and 2 in the first two cells. If you want the series 2, 4, 6, 8..., type 2 and 4.
4. Select the cells that contain the starting values.
5. Drag the fill handle (fill handle: The small black square in the lower-right corner of the selection. When you point to the fill handle, the pointer changes to a black cross.) Across the range that you want to fill.

To fill in increasing order, drag down or to the right. To fill in decreasing order, drag up or to the left.

Is the fill handle missing?

To display the fill handle on a selection of cells, click Options on the Tools menu, click the Edit tab, and then select the Allow cell drag and drop check box.

Use the ROW function to number rows

Note: These numbers are updated when you sort them with your data. However, the sequence may be interrupted if you add, move, or remove rows. You can manually update the numbering by selecting two numbers that are in the right sequence, and then dragging the fill handle to the end of the numbered range.

1. In the first cell of the range that you want to number, type =ROW(A1).

The ROW function returns the number of the row that you reference. For example, =ROW(A1) returns the number 1.

2. Drag the fill handle (fill handle: The small black square in the lower-right corner of the selection. When you point to the fill handle, the pointer changes to a black cross.) n i d o k i d o s Across the range that you want to fill.

Tips

* If you are using the ROW function, and you want the numbers to be inserted automatically as you add new rows of data, turn that range of data into an Excel list (list: A series of rows that contains related data or a series of rows that you designate to function as a datasheet by using the Create List command.) . Select the range, point to List on the Data menu, and then click Create List. All rows that are added at the end of the list will now be numbered in sequence.
* To enter specific sequential number codes, such as purchase order numbers, you can use the ROW function with the TEXT function. For example, to start a numbered list with 000-001, you would enter the formula =TEXT(ROW(A1) ,"000-000") in the first cell of the range that you want to number, and then drag the fill handle to the end of the range.

India in 1835

Technical Problem & Solution from Tech. Experts Team

To

Dear Tech Support Team,

Last year I upgraded from Girlfriend 5.0 to Wife 1.0.

I soon noticed that the new program took up a lot of space and valuable
resources.

In addition, Wife 1.0 installed itself into all other programs and now
monitors all other system activities.

Applications such as BachelorNights 10.3, Cricket 5.0,
BeerWithBuddies 7.5,
and Outings 3.6 no longer runs, crashing the system whenever selected. I
can't seem to keep Wife 1.0 in the background while attempting to run my
favorite applications.

I'm thinking about going back to Girlfriend 5.0, but the 'uninstall'
doesn't
work on Wife 1.0.

Please help!

Thanks,

" A Troubled User"
*
REPLY: *

Dear Troubled User:

This is a very common problem that people complain about.

Many people upgrade from Girlfriend 5.0 to Wife 1.0, thinking that it is
just a Utilities and Entertainment program.

Wife 1.0 is an OPERATING SYSTEM and is designed by its Creator to run
EVERYTHING!! !

It is also impossible to delete Wife 1.0 and to return to Girlfriend 5.0.

It is impossible to uninstall, or purge the program files from the system
once installed.

You cannot go back to Girlfriend 5.0 because Wife 1.0 is designed not to
allow this. (Look in your Wife 1.0 Manual under Warnings-Alimony- Child
Support).

I recommend that you keep Wife1.0 and work on improving the environment.

I suggest installing the background application "Yes Dear" to alleviate
software augmentation.

The best course of action is to enter the command C:\APOLOGIZE because
ultimately you will have to give the APOLOGIZE command before
the system will return to normal anyway.

Wife 1.0 is a great program, but it tends to be very high maintenance.
Wife
1.0 comes with several support programs, such as Clean 2.5, Sweep 3.0,
Cook
1.5 and DoLaundry 4.2. However, be very careful how you use these
programs.
Improper use will cause the system to launch the program NagNag 9.5. Once
this happens, the only way to improve the performance of Wife 1.0 is to
purchase additional software. I recommend Sarees 2.1 and Jewellery 5.0
*
WARNING:* DO NOT, under any circumstances, install SecretaryWithShortS kirt
3.3. This application is not supported by Wife 1.0 and will cause
irreversible damage to the operating system.

Best of luck,

Technical Support Team

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